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Posted

What has four wheels and flies?

Spoiler

The garbage truck

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What do you call a vampire who's car breaks down 3 miles from the blood bank?

Spoiler

A cab

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What can you get at an ice cream parlour that is low in fat with less than 3% sugar?

Spoiler

Napkins

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I went to this bar called The Fiddle. It was a vile inn

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What did the digital clock say to the grandfather clock?

Spoiler

Look, no hands!

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Why did Dracula fail art class?

Spoiler

He kept drawing blood

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What do you call a chicken without feathers?

Spoiler

Chicken strips

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Why don't pirates take a shower before they walk the plank?

Spoiler

They just wash up on shore

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How much does it cost for a pirate to get his ear pierced?

Spoiler

A Buccaneer

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Why does Captain Kirk have 3 ears?

Spoiler

Because he has a left ear, a right ear, and a final Frontier

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How many conductors of a band does it take to change a lightbulb?

Spoiler

I dunno because no one ever looks at the conductor

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Β 

There's a nun, an astronaut, and a hairdryer. They all switch jobs for a day. the nun takes the astronaut's job, the astronaut takes the hairdryer's job, and the hairdryer gets the nun's job. they all meet up later and talk about their day. The nun says, "Oh, space was so beautiful, it truly is a gift from God!". The hairdryer says, "Yes, and being a nun was great! I've never done something so fun!"

The astronaut is silent.

The nun asks what's wrong and the Astronaut says, "Well, i don't mean to be rude hairdryer, but your job blows!" The nun says, "Well, at least you don't have the job as a vacuum salesman, that job sucks."

  • Haha 1
  • 1 month later...
cardboard_killer
Posted

4.jpg.0e6f02e3bbca81dd12ea29943c19b812.jpg

  • Haha 1

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