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Insulting my beloved Mig-3

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*edit* zzzxxxxzzz won the draw for BoBP from The-Doctor!


To qualify you had to insult the Mig-3 (as if it were Cyrano de Bergerac)... but if you can't bring yourself to do so - then quoting poetry at the Mig-3 will do. If you already had more than one module (or have BoBP) feel free to do so as well, you just wouldn't qualify for the give-away)... but we still might get a few challenges to duels out of this :)


P.S. For those of you who may feel self-conscious about your nose: I assume anyone I meet with a large nose is a poet, satirist, and duellist. As a result - I may even be more likely to marry someone with a large nose! I suspect this is because my local public broadcaster kept showing the 1950 version of Cyrano when I was a kid (since they didn't have to pay for the rights). But it is appreciation which makes me point to the long inline engine!

Edited by Avimimus
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51 minutes ago, ShamrockOneFive said:

Poor MiG-3! :)


For the record - the Mig-3 is a favourite... definitely a worthwhile reason to pick up Battle of Moscow for! The long nose helps to give it a poor ability to sustain energy in turns (in spite of being manoeuvrable) but it also allows for some very interesting tricks... it was also a SWOTL mod's Mig-3 (back in the 1990s) which led to my learning that the most interesting plane to fly isn't always the best plane from 1945, and that sometimes it is fascinating to be the under dog with precise but insufficient firepower!


It is with the utmost affection I ask how many birds could perch between propeller and glass. Heck, take a look at this love letter:


Edited by Avimimus
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Sonnet for a Long Nosed Bonnet



Why a sonnet instead of an ode?

Let’s face it, baby,

it’s your high wing load.


You’ve got poor pumps

and your oxygen leaks

and those who love you

are considered, well, freaks.


Roxanne, the beloved, I’m sorry, you ain’t

Even Rostand would add these complaints.


You climb like a pig

who thinks it can fly.

Causing many a poor Soviet

to give up and die.


Mikoyan-Gurevich had to MIG due.

They hadn't yet engineered version 4

to replace you.


Like an avimimus who couldn’t really soar

We have yet to speak of the thing we abhor.


Nose is polite.

Beak is okay.

But schnoz wins out

and takes the day.


I know I risk sounding a little bit crass

but all sorts of pilots admire a plane’s a$$.

Unfortunately, darling, but your empennage is light

given the fact your prop’s out of sight.


Cads will say you’ve an elephant’s snout

Throw down the gauntlet

and call them a lout.


Rapiers are drawn

(though you are armed like a fart)

Please take this mild balm and cold comfort to heart

for blood shed is horrid

a terrible waste

and there's no accounting for some peoples’ taste.


You aquiline nosed beauty

Know this is true

Only the Ta 152

is uglier than you.




Edited by Flying_Colander
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Don't think my first post went through, new account so everything has to be approved so I'll try again later to win a copy. Might as well write a poem in case the Christmas sale doesn't happen since the only servers in my region require Bob and endless turn fights against the AI are getting ridiculous. Best of luck to everyone!

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